Today I want to talk about making big change in your life and how to figure out where to begin. But before I get into that, I just want to say that I cannot believe that this blog has been up for over 3 years already! How did that happen?!
I'm actually really excited about going into the third year of this blog because I have a lot of ideas on how I'd like to post more and make this an even better resource for you. One of the things I'll be doing soon is writing about the life coaching course I am taking through Beautiful You Coaching Academy. Here's a sneak peak at my study corner that I posted on Instagram earlier this week:
My first class is a week from Monday, so I'll spend some time before then writing about how I decided to take the class and also cover what I expect to get out of it.
But for today, we're talking about something else. I was listening to a podcast yesterday by Connie Chapman. Her podcast is called Awaken Radio, and in case you haven't heard of it she covers topics like happiness, confidence, self-love, and spirituality. I would highly recommend checking it out if you are into personal development. The episode I listened to was about "Bringing Your Big Dreams To Life". I had some ideas and I took some notes while I was listening, so here they are...
In order to make big changes in your life, you need to figure out where to start. Sometimes this can be so overwhelming that we quit right there and don't go any further. But generally this can make us feel like we have unresolved issues or like there's something missing. So instead of giving up, I'd like to walk you through how I personally make big changes in my life.
First, you need to put some thought into who you want to be and what that feels like. You might want to ask yourself what kind of energy you want to feel throughout the day. An easy way to do this is to simply pick a word. It can be any word that makes you feel good and embodies the person you ultimately want to be. For this example, we'll use the word Confidence. It clearly explains who I want to be and I already have an idea of what Confidence feels like.
And then the next step is even easier - you simply need to do it. Which sounds stupidly simple and kind of ridiculous. But honestly, give it a try for a day and see how it feels. For example, if you spend a few minutes when you first wake up thinking about Confidence, it's going to plant a seed in your brain that will stay there all day. And every time you remember to think about your word and and how it makes you feel, you'll be watering your plant and it will grow. It's a cheesy analogy, I know, but work with me here...
A lot of times we tend to build up in our heads what it would take to make a change or to start living the life we want to live. We tell ourselves "If I lose weight, then I will be confident". Or "if I find my soulmate, then I will be happy". But what if we are putting the cart before the horse? Isn't it possible that in order to fall in love or in order to lose weight we need to be confident and happy first? And what are confidence and happiness? They are feelings!
What if the answer is to simply feel our way towards living the life we want to live? Honestly, our feelings are one of the only things that we actually have any control over. We can't control the economy, or traffic, or what other people do. Those are all external things. But we can control how we feel each and every day. And it takes a lot of work to be conscious of how you are feeling throughout the day, but once you become aware of your feelings it's easier to navigate and get back on track once you realize you are headed down the road you don't want to go down.
Here are some ways to get in tune with your feelings:
These may seem froufrou or too "spiritual", but in reality they are just ways to quiet your mind and listen to what you are feeling. And that's really what matters.
So in summary, pick a feeling, make a mental decision to embody that feeling for the whole day, and occasionally stop what you are doing and listen to how you are feeling throughout the day. Easy enough, right?
I hope this was a helpful exercise. Please let me know if you have any success following these steps. I would also like to know what other topics you'd like me to cover in the future, so please feel free to leave a comment below with questions or requests.
If you have been reading this blog for any length of time, then you have seen me go through a number of, for lack of a better word, "phases". And for those of you who are reading this blog for the first time, you will have no idea what I'm talking about. But either way, I'm glad you are here and I am about to share some big stuff. And there's a takeaway for everyone at the end, so there's a reason for you to keep reading.
Among the recipes, reading lists, and trip reports on this blog I have also shared some big life updates. Sometimes those updates are in posts called "Life Update" and other times they are simply mentioned within whatever I'm writing about at the time. These updates, or phases as I referred to them earlier, have spanned the last three years since I started this blog. I feel like I've been pretty open on here about my life, mostly because I want to share as much as I can with you.
A lot has happened in the past three years and I feel like I have changed significantly as a person. At one time I made the announcement that I was planning on moving to San Diego and then a few months later I explained that I had changed my mind. And then not long after that I announced I had become a Beachbody coach, only to write a post six months later telling you why I had decided to stop coaching.
Some people may look at these changes and say that I don't know how to make up my own mind. Others may put a positive spin on it and look at is as me constantly moving forward (thank you, Marisa). I simply think of it as being human.
Yes, I have had phases where I say I want to do something and then come back a few months later explaining that I have changed my mind. And yes, these have been pretty big life events. But what I've learned from all this back and forth is that it's important to listen to your intuition and pay attention to what you're feeling. I could have gone through with moving to San Diego and it could have been amazing. But before moving I realized that I was making that decision for the wrong reason and I am very happy that I stayed in Denver.
So...all of this writing has been leading up to another big life update. I have decided to become a life coach! It's still scary to say that out loud, but at the same time it's also exciting. I have been thinking about life coaching for at least a year, even before becoming a Beachbody coach. And looking back I think that might be why Beachbody wasn't a good fit for me, because I was hoping to be a coach who helped women with every aspect of their lives and not focus mainly on their health and fitness.
To me, being a life coach will be my chance to help other women decide what they want their lives to look like and then work with them to make those dreams come true. I want to help women set life-changing goals that will get them closer to living the life they've always imagined. Being a coach will be my chance to use and share some of the tools I have found on my own journey and then help other women apply those tools to their lives.
The first step in my new adventure will be taking a course in life coaching. I did research and found an amazing place called Beautiful You Coaching Academy that offers a six-month course in life coaching. Their next course starts in October and is currently sold out. Thankfully, a spot opened up and I was able to sign up for classes starting in just two months! I know that it will be a big commitment, both financially and with my time, but this is something that I am really excited to do and I can't wait to share my progress once I start.
But enough about me. I've talked your ear off and now it's time to shift our focus! I would like to give you a chance to look at your own life and do a quick evaluation on where things are.
Here's a quick exercise you can follow in order to start thinking about if your life is headed in a direction you would like it to go:
These are all tough questions, so take your time and try to be honest with yourself. You don't even have to know all the answers right now. By reading through this list it will put the questions in the back of your mind. Just listen to your thoughts for the next few days and see if you find your answers when you least expect to.
My reason for asking these questions is to give you a chance to step outside your comfort zone, much like I am doing by becoming a life coach. It's easy to tell yourself you'll "do it someday" or to convince yourself that you'll end up failing, but my advice is not to wait for life to be "perfect" before you decide to do something. Like Thoreau says, "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the live you've imagined."
I truly hope this has been an interesting post and I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic.
Please share your insights and ideas in the comments section below or shoot me an email at email@example.com if you would like to discuss this topic further.
The other night I had a revelation. I realized that I have tried too hard to control my own life, to the point where it has caused me stress and unhappiness. Once I realized this I decided that I need to give up that sense of control. Ultimately, things are going to happen the way they're supposed to happen, with or without my input.
Basically, I just need to let go. The minute I made that decision it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Not only does letting go allow me to save the time and energy I used to spend worrying about things, I have also released myself of responsibility for trying to make everything happen the way I want it to work.
If you are in a similar position and would like to let go, here are some quotes that may motivate you or inspire you.
This first quote stood out to me because of one specific world, which is "should". I don't know about anyone else, but I personally use this word way too much. I am constantly telling myself that I should do this or I should do that. And it's usually a reaction to comparing my life to someone else's life and telling myself that I "should" do what they're doing. Ultimately, this quote is right in that we do have to let go of what "should happen" and embrace what is happening.
This next quote reminds us that there are things in our lives that we hold onto that aren't doing us any good. In fact, they may actually be doing us harm. And yet we keep holding onto them, probably out of habit or fear of change. And yet this quote makes a good point that by letting go of our "heavy burdens" we are able to then let good things enter our lives. Doesn't that just sound like a better way of living?
I especially like this quote because I am an avid reader and enjoy the thought of comparing living my life to reading a book. This is a simple quote and yet it carries a lot of meaning. You are probably already used to hearing people talk about starting a new chapter of their life, but we don't usually think about how in order to start a new chapter we are finishing an old one. And it's so true, you really can't change your life until you are ready to move on.
So these are just a few quotes I found that are related to letting go. Hopefully one or all of them have motivated you to let go of what you're holding onto and make a fresh start. I bet you'll be pleasantly surprised at how good it feels!
For this week's Motivational Monday, I decided to talk about something that everyone has in their life, which is friendship.
Over the years I have made some amazing friends who love me and support me no matter what. I have also had some friends who didn't treat me the way I deserved to be treated. As tough as I was, I had to make the decision to let those people go and move on with my life.
I'm sure this is something that everyone can relate to. It seems like the older we get the more people we count as people we used to be friends with. It's really the special ones who stick around.
And so I looked through my Pinterest board for friendship related quotes and found these three sayings that really stood out to me. I hope they inspire you in some way as well.
This quote from Will Smith really makes sense to me. I like that he points out that you need to be yourself and do your own thing. It seems like those are the moments when you meet the most amazing people. They don't show up when you're looking for them, instead they seem to arrive in your life just when you least expected them.
I agree that a true friend is someone you don't have to chase. The friendship with them will happen naturally at its own pace without having to rush it along. You will connect at the right time for both of you so that you can begin a great friendship that hopefully lasts for a very long time.
When it comes to finding friends sometimes it's hard to decide who deserves your friendship and who isn't worth your time and energy. I agree with the quote above that you deserve to be selective with the people you invite into your life.
Everyone's time is precious and the last thing you want to do is waste time on someone who isn't going to give you the friendship you want and need. A friendship is meant to be a two-way street, with both people dedicating their efforts at making the most out of the friendship.
Once you've found your friends and decided you want them in your life, another testament to a strong friendship is when your friend sticks with you through the good times as well as the bad times. They are truly there for you no matter what you need and are happy to help in any way they can, simply because they love you.
Unfortunately we sometimes realize who these people are in the worst moments of our lives. It's when we hit rock bottom that we really see who is left standing with us, helping us get through it. Not that all friendships have to be tested in the bad times of our lives, but you can really learn who cares about you the most when you're in one of those bad times and see who is there to help you.
Again, I hope one or all of these quotes inspire you. If you have any other quotes, friendship related or otherwise, please share them in the comments below.
Every Monday I plan on posting some motivational quotes that have to do with a specific theme. This week's quotes all have to do with fitness. It seemed like a fitting topic since I am spending so much time and effort on getting in shape and becoming healthier.
These are some of the quotes that have given me the most inspiration over the last couple of months as I've gone on this journey. I like the one above because it reminds me that my body is a gift to be cherished. I need to take care of it in a loving way instead of feeling like I'm working against something that I have hatred towards. Loving your body the way it is will allow you to love and accept yourself, which I think is the first step towards any journey.
Keep reading and I'll explain below what the rest of the quotes mean to me and how they can hopefully help you as well.
"No one has ever become poor from giving." I've seen this quote attributed to both Anne Frank and Maya Angelou. Whoever said it was entirely correct. As part of the focus of this month's happiness project, I've been thinking a lot about money and finances. I truly believe the quote above and also think that the way to become truly rich, in terms of living a fulfilling and abundant life, is to give to others.
That is why I've decided to add a charity donation to my monthly budget. I have many causes I'd like to give to, so I've decided to spread the love and give to a different charity every month.
Here are some of the places I'll be donating to:
All of these places have touched my life in one way or another and I'm looking forward to giving back in some small way.
What are some of your favorite causes or charities to donate to or volunteer for?
For my second month of my Happiness Project I am going to focus on money. I will take a close look at my finances and figure out where I can make some better decisions on spending. I am also going to make a plan on how to get myself out of debt and start a savings plan.
Unlike the picture above, I do not want money to control my life. I'd rather get a plan in place that runs smoothly on its own so I can live my life but still spend wisely.
In order to start making financial plans, I need to know where I stand. In order to get a good picture of my money situation, I am going to use Mint.com to track my spending. Their tagline is "It's easy to understand what's going on with your money." They pull all your financial accounts into one place and let you use that data to create budgets and track your goals.
They have a great mobile app that you can put on your phone so your financial information is always at your fingertips.
Now it's time for me to get tracking!
This is the end of my first month doing my own happiness project. At the beginning of the month I explained how I wanted to spend time focusing on my identity by embracing who I am and loving myself unconditionally. I'd like to end the month by working on letting go of expectations and embracing the fact that I can't continue to expect my life to be perfect, because it will never live up to that standard.
I found the quote above that says "What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be." This quote reminds me that most of the time I have a picture in my head of how my life it supposed to look, and if reality doesn't match up to that picture I tend to feel disappointed and sad. What I'd like to focus on is appreciating what I do have instead of what I don't have. Hopefully this new way of thinking will help me to be happier with everyday life.
What are some things that you can change in your thinking that would make you happier?
"Enjoy the little things in life, because one day you will look back and realize they were the big things."
This quote reminds me that there are things happening in my everyday life that I will eventually look back on and realize how much they impacted my life. They may not seem big now, but one day I'll realize how important they really were. Far too often I breeze through my day without stopping to appreciate the small things. I tend to take them for granted without a second thought.
For the third week of my happiness project, I have decided to focus on appreciating the small joys of every day life and also purposefully doing things that make me happy. They don't have to be big, elaborate things...just little things that make my day a little brighter.
Here are some of the ideas I've come up with:
My goal will be to incorporate some of these ideas into my everyday life to add a little joy to my day.
What are some of your favorite ways to brighten your day?
Do you ever read your friends' status updates on Facebook and think to yourself that their life must be so much better than your own? I know I'm guilty of doing that all the time. That's why I have to remind myself of the quote by Steve Furtick that says "The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel." And I honestly think that is a huge part of people being unhappy with their life. They forget that most people only show the world the good things going on in their life and usually keep the bad stuff out of sight. And then they wonder what is wrong with their own life that they don't have just as many good things to share with the world.
This is what I'm going to focus on for my second week of my Happiness Project. I'm still going to go on Facebook and be happy for my friends who have great things going on in their lives. But at the same time, I'm going to stop comparing my life to theirs and realize that nobody's life is perfect. We all have bad things happen to us, it's just a matter of spending more time and energy focusing on the good things instead of always worrying about the not-so-good things.
Can anyone else relate to this cycle of comparing your life to everyone else and then allowing yourself to feel bad about your own situation? If so, please share your thoughts in the Comments section!
My name is Beth and I live in Denver. I am a single lady in my 30's and wanted to start sharing my awesome and amazing life through a blog.